Frickin’ Finch!

Since about a week after I bought my car, it’s been getting regularly pooped on by one or more small birds while in my parking space at home. There are a few modest trees adjacent to my space, and the pattern and location of the poop indicates that the offending parties do their business as they take off from the tree at the front of my space and fly over my car.

I’ve been looking for these poopie birds for a while now. Recently, I noticed a concentration of bird droppings on the ground behind my car, under another tree. I looked in that tree over and over, and today, I found one of the culprits (or maybe it’s a LONE culprit): a little yellow fuzzy finch-like bird. I looked at it. It looked at me.

“YOU BASTARD!!!” I yelled. Okay, not really.

So, having come face to face with the pooper, what do I do next?

I want to dissuade it, and any of its friends, from hanging out in the trees near my car without hurting them. How do I do that?

I’m really hoping there’s a way, because if they keep pooping on my car, I’m eventually going to resort to sniping them with BBs, which is not good for any of the parties involved.

No, I can’t just let them keep pooping on my car. Bird poop is bad for the paint. The NEW paint.

And no, I am not going to get a car cover. That is simply not a reasonable solution for a daily commute vehicle, not to mention I’d be touching bird poop all the time taking it on and off.

Also no, I’m not going to park on the street. I’m all for these birds having a happy hangout somewhere, but not enough to donate my parking spot to the cause. Not unless they want to pay for part of my rent.

So, readers, especially those of you who care or know something about birds, how do I make them go away?


  1. Cut down the trees!

  2. But then that’s not nice to the poor trees! Plus, my apartment manager would likely not enjoy that.

  3. i dunno about a solution, but i’m still at war with the cat who peed on my car when it was new. the darn thing still leaves paw prints and fur all over. bah!
    so, sorry i have no solution, but i sympathize.

  4. You can try one of those (sometimes inflatable) owl decoys that you hang in the tree to scare the birds, or some people use an inflatable snake for the same thing. There is the tried and true Southern garden method of using metal pie tins. The shiny reflective pie tins swing in the wind and frighten the birds away from gardens and other things like cars that you don’t want them near. The modern alternative to that has become old CD’s or DVD’s hung from strings. Just as reflective and swingy-aroundy, but much easier to find than pie tins. They may work just hung between the tree and your car to keep the birds from flying in that direction.
    Some people swear by these things, some people say they don’t work at all, your mileage may vary as usual :)

  5. Oh, it would probably help if I mention that local garden centers would have some of these things.

  6. if you can reach, cut some of the branches that are over your car? i have a branch lopper, happy to bring it over.
    or, if it’s your dedicated spot, put one of those carport thingies up like my neighbor did. not pretty but it’s probably the easiest, long term solution.

  7. You can try to hang shiny strips of mylar at the edge of the carport so the don’t swoop over your car. Similar to what fruit tree farmers and vineyards do. Not sure where to get the mylar and not sure your apt. manager will approve but less destructive all around.

  8. You can get the scare strips at OSH. But we put them on our fig tree and it didn’t work. The birds still came to the tree… they just chose to land on branches without mylar strips.

  9. Buy a niger seed feeder and hang it on an alternate route? ;-)

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